There's one place where there's a more usual English idiom than the one you chose: in line 11, "the very death" doesn't really fit in, I think a better choice would be "death itself"Īt one point I think your English is probably wrong, but maybe I don't understand the Spanish: line 14 needs "in" or "after" rather than "within" because "within 100 years" qualifying a positive means "at some point not more than 100 years away", not "at the point one hundred years from now" or "at every point in the next 100 years".Īnd finally, one place where I'm not sure whether you mean wnat you've written, or something a bit different: that's line 13, where the position of "together" in the clause can change the meaning you have it at the beginning, so the clause means "whenever we are together we will sleep" moving it to the end changes the meaning to "whenever we sleep we will sleep together".
Two omissions that I suspect are just typing errors:
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